Equuality: Reflections on Life with Horses

Releasing Fear, Unleashing Genius

About the Book

Any fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius-and a lot of courage-to move in the opposite direction. -Albert Einstein

I have noticed that there is a tendency in much of the horse world towards making things bigger, more complex, and more assertive. I have found it to be especially true in those that are trying to teach others how to work with horses. They make every move large and exaggerated, using more energy and more force than is necessary to get the message across. In most, if not all, of these cases, I feel that they are sacrificing the long-term health of their relationships to accomplish a short term goal.

The most striking instance of this phenomenon that I have witnessed was when I attended a local clinic by an internationally renowned horsemanship trainer. His first principle was that in order to get anything else done, you had to get your horse out of your personal space. His second principle was that you should start with more than enough pressure, and then work down from there. Within half an hour he had twenty loving horse owners hitting their horses first and not even bothering to ask questions later. The sound of people hitting their horses was deafening. It was such a disturbing and saddening experience that we left after just a few hours, forfeiting the seventy-five dollars we had paid for an entire weekend's admission.

I have come to believe that when people behave this way towards their horses, the underlying motivation is fear. Horse owners are afraid they aren't doing it "right," or that someone will make fun of them for not using enough force, or that their horse will walk all over them if they don't "teach him who's boss." Trainers are afraid that if they don't have all the answers or if they don't get results quickly enough, that people will think they are frauds. I myself have fallen into all of these traps numerous times and every time it feels terrible. The short-term gain is always outweighed by the long-term loss.

To my mind, the remedy lies in the knowledge that our fears are natural and shared by many others. Nearly every student I have worked with, regardless of their age, past experiences, or temperament, has confided in me that they are, or have been, afraid of horses. Sometimes it's the first thing out of their mouth, before they even tell me their name. Sometimes they've been working with seeming confidence for months before they share their secret with me.

Almost always, they are surprised to hear that they are not alone in their fears. To my mind, it's totally natural; horses are very powerful and the only creatures larger than humans that most of us will ever encounter. They speak mostly in body language and energy, while we are trained to pay attention to words alone. Thus, for the same reasons that they are so fulfilling, they are also intimidating.

The good news is this: I have found that usually, once a person admits their fears aloud and understand that they are not alone, the fears begin to dissipate. For some this happens quickly, for others it is a lengthy process. In every case, once the fear is admitted the innate genius is released and courage arises to move forward from a position of peace and love for the horse.